Friday, Oct 19, 2019
A Friend Passes
My Friend Melody
I had sad news this week. My friend Melody, a truly beautiful person, passed away. Her husband Roy sent the news out and my heart broke for him. They were such good companions. Always together, and always happy to connect with others. Melody lived generously both from her heart and hand.
I met Melody and her husband Roy when I lived in Bahia de Caraquez. Before they moved back to the US last year, they visited Heidi and I here on the beach for a few weeks. The four of us would walk the beach between San Jose and Curia, or San Jose and La Entrada as often as we could.
What made these walks especially amazing is that Melody had a terminal lung disease. Breathing was a workout for her. Nothing she did to cause it; just an idiosyncratic disease she got stuck with. It was diagnosed years ago and she outlived any doctor’s expectations. Somehow that is exactly how I came to know Melody; no one was going to tell her what she had to do. She operated on her own schedule and made her own itineraries.
Reminders
Melody’s passing is once again a reminder of the constant change of things. Days, weeks, months, even years can pass where nothing seemingly changes. As human beings, we hold an unrealistic belief, almost to the point of delusion, that we will always be able to visit this place or that, or see this person or that one. It simply isn’t true. Melody knew this.
From what I observed about her, Melody lived without taking each day for granted. What a gift! I believe we have all had moments of clarity about the tenuousness of life. The trick, the challenge, maybe even the goal is to remember to live each day fully. Breathe each one in deeply. Embrace it with intention. Find the gift.
Life Embraces
Why wait for the perfect situation to do that thing tapping your thoughts and pulling at your heart? Look at it. Invite it in. Get to know it better, then act with intention. These things do not all have to be life changing events. Most are probably small, yet they provide life embraces.
Lined up, one after the other, even seemingly small embraces would provide a rich canvas to reflect upon and be comforted by when it is time to go. I wonder how it feels to leave this existence with a life fully lived? Satisfying I would think. I hope that is my experience.
Breathe Deeply
In the mean time I choose to remember this lesson about living from my friend Melody. As I walked the beach this week, I reflected on Melody walking in the same sand I do now. Despite the terrible weather we were having when she visited, she was just happy to be here. She was breathing in deeply.
Enjoy this next leg of your travels Melody. No visa required.
Chau.
Dear Todd…So sorry about Melody, she was a wonderful soul and a beautiful person.
I agree with that! Thanks for reading.
I adore this blog post. I definitely subscribe to Melody’s view on life, and that has come from facing, embracing, and always remembering about death. It is beautiful that you can learn something through this natural transition. What a gift your attitude makes!
Thanks Vironika. True story indeed. I miss you guys! Hope all is going well.
Beautiful tribute to a friend. Best wishes to you and her family
Thank you Carol
That is a beautiful tribute to a beautiful person. I am so sorry you lost your friend. I am going to try harder to live each day as if it is my last.
I think we all might be a little less stressed about the small stuff if we did that better. I know it applies to me. Thanks for reading Sharon.
What a sad yet great post, Todd. A tribute to someone who sounds like a wonderful person, able to play the less than stellar hand that life had dealt here. I wonder how I would deal with a similar situation and if I would come up lacking. Definitely something to think about every morning as I greet another day.
I agree Ian. Problems are always so relative. Gratitude in every moment is key I think. Thanks for reading.
Hey Todd, what a beautiful post and tribute to Mel – she would have loved it. When we met Melody back a few years, we had no idea she had a terminal illness. She didn’t let on when we first met her. She didn’t wallow in her sorrow or say POOR ME! She lived live with full love and appreciation, as you say, to the fullest, It’s been a tough battle for Melody, yet she took it in her stride and worked so hard to be healthy and love a long time. She certainly did that. I think back at some of the times when we were all together – and cherish those times immensely. To Roy, who was such a devoted and wonderful husband, we send our love, prayers and strength to you. You have been Melody’s ROCK. RIP dear sweet Melody.
What beautiful words and sentiment for Mel. Thanks for sharing Darlene. Glad you and John are back south of the equator. 🙂