Friday, Aug 30, 2019
I’m filled with melancholy this week. Everything I have been doing is for the “last time”. These feelings that arise in me usually have some amount of sadness mixed with them. I guess it’s because the life and activities I know here in Ecuador are coming to a close.
When I am aware that something is a “last time” event, I stay present with what is happening, what I am feeling. Instead of pushing away what feels like sadness, or loneliness, or nostalgic memories that will never happen in the same way again, I have been embracing these feelings. I let them flow through me. Created from so many memories here, they are powerful. I choose to stand in awe and gratitude for the experiences of the last three and a half years.
In many ways these few years living in Ecuador feel like a lifetime to me. Living here with my family, and living here alone, each created unique experiences I will cherish forever. The people I have met, the friends I have made, are so rich and colorful. The experiences I have had with them, the experiences I have had with my family, have added so much to the tapestry of my life.
This week I made the final strides to get everything I have into two suitcases (and one carry on). Going through all the things I have, and looking at all I need to get rid of, I realized something. My wife really created a home. It was hitting me hard as I was going through every closet, cupboard, and drawer.
Whether it was soft bed sheets and towels, perfect containers to hold things we used frequently or not very much at all, useful kitchen tools and cookware to make the perfect meal, there was thought in what she brought into our home. The end result was my life was made more comfortable, easier, and more enjoyable because of it. Thank you Heidi for giving me something special that I often didn’t even see.
Remember our dog Keeper? We brought her to Ecuador with us and within six months she was suffering from an unrecognized heart condition and had to be put to sleep. Man, that was a hard period. I still have her ashes, and now it’s time to do something with them.
Up until now, I haven’t been in too big of a hurry to do that. When I looked at her small doggy house urn with her favorite stuffed toys, it gave me an opportunity to pause and feel good thinking of her. Honestly, since she died, I have never found a place that felt right to place her ashes.
Living here in San Jose has been a wonderful experience; so many great memories and activities with my family, and many fun times with good friends. Of course the beach is awesome and the ocean mesmerizing on this property. So, I found a shady spot under a big palm tree with a great view of the beach, and that is where I laid Keeper to rest. I feel good about that.
My friend Aurobindo from Cuenca was in Puerto Lopez this week. He contacted me and wanted to visit before I left. He and his friend K.P. jumped on the bus in Puerto Lopez and headed my way. The bus stopped right in front of my house and dropped them off.
After a couple of cups of coffee chatting in mi casa, we headed to Olon to the South Indian restaurant and had a great lunch. The sun even came out for us. I was happy I had the chance to say goodbye in person to a friend who I have known from almost the beginning of my time in Ecuador.
I have enjoyed my visits to Montanita this week. It has a feeling like no other place I’ve been…chaotic, interesting, fun, safe, and always something new to see. On this particular day I listened to these two men perform and watched them draw quite a good crowd.
Another activity I had in Montanita was a get together with friends for pizza at Marea’s. It was a farewell and goodbye dinner. How fun to spend an evening with my friends laughing about crazy things that happen while we have lived here.
Being finally packed, the house cleaned and ready for the next people to enjoy, I feel I can begin to get excited about what lies ahead for me.
I will land in Medellin, Colombia Saturday morning. I’ve rented an Airbnb room for a month while I find an apartment to rent. I’m fortunate to have some friends and connections there already. I know it will make this transition easier for me.
I don’t know if my blog will continue. I don’t feel the passion I had about sharing what’s happening in Colombia as I did with Ecuador. I’m leaving this door open to decide as I go along.
In the mean time, thank you all for reading and commenting. I appreciate the insights and support many of you shared with me along the way. It truly is a blessing to experience this unique form of connection with people I would otherwise not have an opportunity to cross paths with.
So for now…..