Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Our realtor Daniel showed us two places this morning for us to move into. Neither property is going to work for us. The first was just run down, needed new paint and some TLC. It could look great if someone took the time with some minor repair and remodeling. The second was just a box in a building stacked on top and in between other boxes. It was a new box and that was nice, but no personality.

I am working on finding the positives of our current situation. I believe if we stay in Cuenca for the next six months we will see and do some interesting and fun things that just aren’t available on the coast. It is about creating experiences.

Our housing dilemma is an experience I would have rather not created or be participating in now. However, it’s here and happening. I have a strange sensation in my body around this. It feels like I am one step away from homelessness.

I think this feeling is coming from fear. Fear that we won’t find a place we like and enjoy living in; fear I will spend too much money moving in and out of different housing situations until we do find something that works; fear that I will be living in a country, with its own considerable challenges, and not find that sense of peace and enjoyment I had before the earthquake.

This fear does not serve me. It is made of imaginations that are not real and scenarios that are less than likely to occur. It is an emotion that binds, constricts, and stunts my personal growth.

This type of fear impedes my ability to create and develop the life I want to be living. Does this ever happen to you? How do I get beyond this place that has captured my brain and my attention? How do you handle it?

I will walk you through what I am doing.

  1. Name your fear.

The problem with unnamed fear is that the vagueness of what is actually bothering me adds to my general sense of unease and anxiety. Naming exactly what I am afraid of makes it concrete and tangible.

I am afraid that I will be homeless and broke on the streets of Cuenca.

  1. Identify what the facts are of your situation.

These kinds of fearful imaginations create thoughts that are more extreme than even my worst case scenario. It is important to identify and acknowledge facts, and stay away from fiction.

I am living in a safe place, have a roof over my head, and am comfortable.

I will not leave this place until I have something better to replace it with.

I have money in the bank to keep a roof over my head and stay comfortable.

My worst case scenario: I buy tickets and fly home.

  1. Identify what is true now as you move forward through your fear.

By identifying the tools, resources, and ideas I have available to create my desired outcome, I can move away from fearful imaginations and into concrete solutions to achieve my desired outcome. Doing this takes the energy out of my fear. It can’t grip my mind and emotions.

I have resources in the form of family and friends to help me find a good place to live.

I have the ability, through time and financial resources, to find a place better suited for us, and create a great environment for me and my family to experience Cuenca while we are here.

  1. Ask yourself, “Based on what is true for me now, is my fear valid”?

When the light of fact and truth shine upon fearful imaginations, they can be seen for what they are…untrue and invalid.

No, my fear is not valid.

5. Based on what is true how are you doing? 

I am doing what I want and my life is moving in the direction I want it to go.

I am doing great.

 6. Breathe in what is true.

Let this awareness fill your body where fearful imaginations once were. Let yourself feel the power of truth inside you.

After I walk through these steps I breathe in my new reality. I breathe in those things that are true. I am doing well and will continue to do so.

Chau.